These are the doldrums, 208 days remaining

And so it was determined that contract would be honored above all else. There would be no early return home. There would be no warm summer in Lincoln. There would be seven more months on the other side of the planet. The subtle longings for home would have to be dealt with. The isolation would have to be dealt with. The time would have to be filled.

Now the rules have changed. The five month mark has produced unforeseen difficulties. Looking down the barrel of seven more months causes one to draw new conclusions. The first, the novelty has worn off. The thing that made the first third of this adventure fly by was the newness of a fresh environment. The constant new information was refreshing and exciting but the strength of routine is back and now information has a cognitive schema to fit into.

The second, I am not quite halfway finished. Close enough that I can consider my next move after Korea but far enough that attempts at gathering information are met with a polite we-don't-know-our-situation-yet form email. Stuck in the zone of a closing semester and a tantalizingly close downhill slide leads to conclusion three.

I am stuck on the peninsula now. There is no other option for the following two hundred and eight days. While all my friends enjoy the fruits of a traditional Nebraska summer I have a duty to perform and it will be discharged. Sometimes it fun. Sometimes I genuinely enjoy doing this work, connecting with kids and transferring knowledge can be very rewarding. Other times the constant yelling, touching and running around lead to panic attacks and crippling loneliness. The nights where three a.m. walks to Russ's and a cup of coffee at midnight become sacred moments in a past life.

With new resolve and hopeful optimism I prepare for the change that is always going to come.